This article is sort of an addendum to Please, no more empty luggage, where I list careless or sloppy things that directors allow, and say “Here are a few things that bug me when I see them in a movie. Allow me to get them off my chest.”
There are several things that can show us an actor is not actually dead, breaking the movie magic; looking dead isn’t just squeezing your eyes shut and clenching your jaw. In fact, those things only serve to prove you’re still alive, and probably not a good actor. First, make yourself comfortable. You don’t want to have to adjust your underwear halfway through the scene.
To look truly dead, relax, completely. Let gravity happen. Let your body lose its tension and fall in on itself. Relax your facial muscles and let your face sag. Let your mouth fall open, let your tongue loll as gravity wills it. Let your eyes go ‘soft’ – look at a single spot on the wall without bringing it into focus. There’s a YouTube video called Acting Dead where actor Doug Fahl gives extensive tips on how to play dead on stage or screen, including simple methods of breath control.
I never saw a truly convincing on-screen strangulation until Tony Soprano killed Ralph Cifaretto. Ralph had it coming, both for engineering the racetrack fire that killed Pie-O-My and for beating to death Tracee, Tony’s young friend from the Bada Bing. As Tony strangles Ralph, he shouts in his face “She was a beautiful, innocent creature!”, leaving us to wonder whether he means Tracee or the horse.
When the fight ends, Ralph is dead, and certainly looks it. Not for the faint of heart, here’s a YouTube video of Ralph’s murder.
Hey, special-effects people, here’s an idea: how about a neck wrapper made of flesh-tone Play-Doh so we can see the killer’s fingers really digging in?
If a script requires a captive be kept quiet, remember that gagging someone with a rag or article of clothing does not work in real life, no matter how you do it. “Mmmmglurrrgg!” Hello, we can still hear you!
This leads us to duct tape.
Lifetime Movie Network is the primary offender against duct-tape reality. On Lifetime at least twice a week, weeping kidnap victims wear a neat rectangle of duct tape barely wide enough to cover their mouth. Is there a shortage of duct tape? I’ve never kidnapped anyone, but when I do, they’re going to get at least two yards of duct tape wrapped around their head to keep them quiet.
If I ever get to be a Lifetime director, we’ll have rolls and rolls of fake duct tape, standard gray on one side but no adhesive on the other, and you better believe you’re going to see the bad guy walking around his prisoner at least twice, tightly wrapping their head, mouth and hair. Sorry if this disturbs anyone, remember it’s only a movie.